Sailor Noob

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! The end commences and things are going on in Sailor Moon Crystal's first season finale, as Usagi must struggle against a triumphant Queen Metalia! Is this the end for Earth and the Sailor Senshi or can love win out over darkness and hate? In this episode, Kal talks about the "Red Thread of Fate", Yue Lao, the Chinese god of marriage, Diyu or the Chinese underworld, the fables "The Wedding Shop" and "The Cowherd and the Weaver Girl", the Qixi festival, and theTanabata festival. Plus, nurturing your spirit bomb, glove nails, LOVE PEOPLE COOK THEM TASTY FOOD, Humoon Resources, deus ex crystallo, Kat Facts with Ka1iban, reverting the fakeout, Bishonen Artemis, ripping off fairy tales, comic books vs. fantasy, the magical realism of Sailor Moon, frozen senshi, playing the end of the scene, Barbie vs. He-Man, Franz Josef Land, cave troll hula hoops, gentrified watches, shaming the old…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! It's the penultimate episode of Sailor Moon Crystal's first season, as the Sailor Senshi face off against Queen Metalia in a battle for the Earth! Can Usagi stand alone in defense of the planet or will humanity fall to an ancient evil? In this episode, Kal talks about King Arthur in Japan and his Japanese cognate: Emperor Jimmu. Plus, a weird wild wooly wander of a real cowboy ride, the sword of holy +1, too big faces, battered Luna, Sailor PMs, giving Satan a nuke, Mun teleporting, Super Seducer Moon, watching the show in a mirror, Metalia's tight five, lazy devices, accepting fake sacrifices, forgeting your nemesis's name, entertaining train wrecks, learning vs. winning, cat parenting, extra god toes, and hate watching without the hate! #Venuswasrobbed! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! This week, the Sailor Senshi fight desperately to save Mamoru from the clutches of Queens Beryl and Metalia! Will the powers of love and friendship be able to break his evil bonds or will Usagi have to make the ultimate sacrifice? In this episode, Kal talks about the cultural history of s*icide in Japan, seppuku, and the concept of amae. Plus, Vader v. Senshi, Mamoru is the Jean Grey, putting all your points into Force Push, deleting your reddit account, Bunki with the good hair, Luke in the throne room, souls confirmed, hair tentacles, eating okay, death to all accessories, letting your story elements go off one by one, sparing you the play, sitcom medical treatments, a probationary dictator, restoring and excruciating energy, Nephrite is their Jupiter, all destiny...no life, Queen beryl is Madeline Pryor, throwing purple fruits, and a payoff with no money! It's just Star Wars…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! The Sailor Senshi have returned from their Moon mission to rescue Mamoru, only to find that he's already back?! But this Mamoru goes by "Endo", and he'll stop at nothing to possess the Legendary Silver Crystal! In this episode, Kal talks about the Tenka Goken or the "Five Swords under Heaven", and other mythical swords of Japanese history. Plus, a "slight male perspective", J. Jonah Kenji, laserheads, Sailor Summers, insecure Luna, taking time to recompress, ouch sticks, Sailor GIRLS, a Lemon Cafe party, Shamoru, messin' with that Endo, joyful cardiomegaly, keeping your slumber party on task, not needing your wedding ring, Dragonslayer, selling Aunt May's house, GCC ASAP, the Fortress of Swallowfood, full-on queerbaiting, Mask Tuxedo, The Nut Kick of Great Justice, a new echelon of passive protagonist, the problem with Jupiter, sword doctors, and the Reese's peanut butter cup of…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! This week, the Sailor Senshi head for the Moon to unlock the secrets of thier past. Back on Earth, Tuxedo Mask remains missing and the Queen Beryl's minions are preparing to put Tokyo in deep freeze! In this episode, Kal talks about Japanese Moon myths, Chang’e and Yutu, The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter and Princess Kaguya,and Princess from the Moon. Plus, Munriting, second fiddles, blaming your guidance counselor, "72 hours earlier...", fairy people from the Moon, T-minus 21600 minutes, blue moon balls, Prince Shingo, matrilineal soul inheritance, hard fantasy, mum from another millennium, Obi-Wan or Leia?, ChatGPQueen, Yaz warnings, Google Cave, better as bishounen, 100% team nature, shojo or shonen?, being a moon wife guy, imitation fire rat, farting at the wrong revelation, Moony McMoonface, and sakuga donuts! Santa is a cop! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! The Legendary Silver Crystal has been found but Tuxedo Mask has been lost! Wlll learning the shocking truth about her ancient past be too much for an overwhelmed Usagi? In this episode, Kal talks about josei tenno or "women emperors". Plus, the lie of the "Sailor V anime", Takeuchi and Tolkien, eating the cheese out of Sailor Moon Crystal, dying with your mask on, fake Peter brook tips, wrestling with serial storytelling, adaptation vagaries, "Kami's Law", the Sailor Moon divinity org chart, 50% Arrested Development quotes, passing out equality, the Legendary Crystal Display, catsicles and Luna pathos, ditching Joseph Campbell, shojo body horror, dating the emperor's sister, Oops! all Buddhism, a King Ralph event, and my stupid ideas! #nobloodforcrystal Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! The Sailor Senshi have a new ally in the battle against the Dark Kingdom! But But even Sailor V's powers may not be enough to stop Queen Beryl from first taking Toyko...and then the world! In this episode, Kal talks about shiitake mushrooms and long Japanese vowels or "chouon". Plus, Venus fever, BTAS, refreshing the Power Rangers, entrelacement, getting to the Frodo factory, RAV4 fondue, typical cat face, "Too nervous to bi", insert coin for capitalism, "Usagi needs food badly", watch grabbing, killing the Les Mis cast, DomiNOOOOOOOs, clock confirmed, Rodan's The Screamer, the Legendary Silver Mineral, cutting away from an origin, Swiss cheese memory, Appetite = 7, sealing in the flavor, competent Artemis, and wanting to get lost! Minako is the Wolverine! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on…

Secrets are revealed this week, as Usagi and Mamoru finally have a heart-to-heart. Can they get closer to each other before Zoisite gives them an unhappy ending? In this episode, Kal talks about DVD pupularity and rental in Japan, oshikatsu or Japanese "stans", oshi or "favorite", and recycle shops. Plus, being easily brought to tears, villain duos, characters over story, using only part of your ass, relevant non-sequiturs, The McDonald's of animation, getting rid of teasers, bite worse than bark, Sensitive Steve, "gonnabarfey", the Bag Cut, Aladdin's Basement, Blurry Krang, being Crystal simpatico, sticky Dead Zone situations, WRAP IT UP, Kaliban's Komedy Klass, a conservation of magic, orange balling, Betamaxxxine, getting to the Minako factory, and too much Doctor Who talk! They got my letters! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! This week, Tuxedo Mask is on TV and Zoisite is in heels! The Sailor Senshi are introduced to a larger world, while their own is on the brink of chaos and disaster! In this episode, Kal talks about "owarai" and "baraeti" or Japanese TV comedy and variety shows. Plus, Act 6 - TM 0, treating the series as hostile, perfecting your pacing, entertaining breakdowns, Crystal googling, listening to an autopsy, Re: The Legendary Silver Crystal, making your own fluid, Mike Wallace on Tuxedo Mask, localizing for Australia, the Way That You Use It, Freiza's tee time, a demonstration planet, magic college, the karaoke murder basement, water lasers, edging anticipation, tipping your videogame character, Rib-diculous Reincarnation, using your evil powers for not good, magicking away latex, anime background noise, and folding when you should have gone all-in! #endlessbrownexpanse Give the gift…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! There's a new transfer student at Juban Middle and she's both mysterious and intimidating! Will Usagi and friends win her over before Nephrite's mannequins can dress them down? In this episode, Kal talks about the history and customs of Shinto weddings, wedding dresses in Japan, and wedding deities. Plus, the truth of trees, moon pranks, Scandinavian solidarity, The Gamut of Girly Things, adaptational dysfunction, The Crow vs. Splinter, smashing uvulas, The Hero of a Thousand Quesos, True Colors, the girl with both the gifts, Teriyaki Superman, Justice Leaguein', an empty God Driving chair, medically tall, busting all the time, watchcatting, bone deep wackiness, Usagi Tyler, losing the Peter Parker, boy kryptonite, pregaming your wedding reception, Girl Thanksgiving, Crystallizing it, Apron Lady, and wheres's Shucream Sundae?! Happy Pride! Check out historical Japanese weddings…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! The Sailor Senshi are now three, and it's time to complete the search for their Princess and the Silver Crystal! Can they swing a victory at a fancy masquerade ball or will the Dark Kingdom dance on their faces? In this episode, Kal talks about the history of magatama in Japan. Plus, being weirdly at sea, rats vs. crows, Athenian propaganda, prequel pitches, The Dark Moonie, going off your wheatcakes, repiloting, Luna C. Cat, Crystal Taco Bell, Bicuriousagi, Silverkingdomchair, Mr. Tsukino thirstposting, "hot, but not to trot", the Moon Crystal pushup, Umino face, tuxedo interruptus, three quarters of Four Kings, the Pluto of precious minerals, a middle-class kofun, and Usagi Famine Watch! Love is the ultimate accessory! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening platform…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! People in Tokyo are disappearing when they ride a bus that travels through Azabu-Juban! Can the mysterious miko from a nearby shrine help Usagi defeat this urban terror? In this episode, Kal taks about crows in Japan and crow legends, like Yatagarasu and the tengu. Plus, being a firestarting reincarnated super soldier moon alien, more Sailor Star Wars, "I'll be there for Puu", "filler" vs filler episodes, Hyper Beryl, youma-in-waiting, The Return of Obasan Joker, Umino jump scares, Class "S" lit, back to the gay room, debarking, adaptational artifacts, purse roadkill, limited omniscience, Sailor Lawyer, meox mix-nay, 1-star shrine reviews, "doing a bat cave", facepawing, "Ipanema moments", Tengu Otis Redding, teleport questions, and bobo Sailor Pluto! Mess with the crow and you gotta go! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob!…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! Usagi is the superhero Sailor Moon, but now it's time to find more allies in her search for the Silver Crystal. Will pass with flying colors or learn a deadly lesson in the cram school of hard knocks? In this episode, Kal taks about gakujushu juku or "cram schools", and Wish High. Plus, "second beautiful", dirty dogging, kaibosh versus kibosh, Sailor Star Wars , a 30 in English, cram school scouting, being too cool for Fonzie, falling angels, Ami=Christian?, pushing in to Homer territory, self-keying latches, finally realizing its a kids show, North Korean games, top hat on a top hat, copying PGSM's homework, a griftery air, 20% of a T-1000, exhuming the lede, and Game Crown Cafe??? #BLAMschool Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe…

Sailor Noob Crystal is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan goes episode by episode through the 2014 Sailor Moon reboot series! An all-new season of Sailor Noob starts right here as we begin our journey through Sailor Moon Crystal! Usagi is 14, a crybay, you know the drill. But how is she going to deal with e-mail and smartphones? It's been 20 years since the first Sailor Moon series, and Usagi and friends are back for an all-new adaptation of her manga adventures! In this episode, Kal taks about chiki neko and nora neko, Tama the Station Master cat, and Nekonomics. Plus, poor Pluto, breaking your coccyx, the return of Naked Usagi, inventing mornings, color pedantry, being the Lilly Moscovitz, Is Naru rich?, black-tie Count Chocula, arcade chairs, Not Mom, pre-war cop slang, "Bad Mom, Worse Brother", study nap confirmed, getting Toho in your Toei, 20/20 retroactive clairvoyance, Moon Meow, screaming your attack, Clubbin' Janet Van Dyne, and being a cat with two jobs! #pinkgoblin Give the gift of a Sailor…

Sailor Noob is returning on Friday, May 1st, for an all-new season covering Sailor Moon Crystal! Details on this short episode!

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! This week, we give our final thoughts on Sailor Moon Stars, answer audience questions, and say goodbye to Sailor Moon! We also talk about the biggest spoiler challenge, our favorites and least favorites, putting glue on pizza, dumb doctors, Teenage Adultesque Sailor Girls, Kalnip, Sailor Intermediate, Stockholms syndrome, doing the numbers, going to one, enjoying your own tea, bringing back Mimette, the dragon switch, our gun-to-head picks, Dr. Syphilis triumphant, getting eugenicky, Cincy's Oh my God counts, reaching 100% cultural penetration, Arthur C. Clarke power, playing with your sword, and Sopranos french fries! Thanks for joining us onthis adventure! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The saga comes to a close this week as Usagi faces off against Galaxia for the fate of the galaxy! Can one girl stand alone against the legendary Sailor Senshi? In this episode, we discuss magical girls. We also talk about grating doppelgangers, spoilers ahoy, getting your bits out, Debbie Harry, rapier and diaper, Hug Assault, going for TV-MA, a Shin Godzilla level of damage, getting blipped, 185 dead car ladies, turning the "In the Manga..." tables, the Chibi Chibi secret sauce, Sex Switch, Sally the Witch = Thor, Late Night Anime, magical boys, and Shojo is third person! The sword was a little kid! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription to your favorite noob! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Hope is a precious commodity this week as Galaxia stands triumphant over the remains of Earth's defenders! Is there anyone who can stand against the Legendary Sailor Senshi and her campaign of destruction? In this episode, we discuss the Ainu people and their history and culture. We also talk about forgetful princesses, Bluey Time, point broken, Galactic Lampshade Attack, Chibi Wan, Sailor Cop, becoming fecund, abyss gazin', the very last "What Kal Thinks Is Going to Happen", panspermia, when Khabarovsk Krai, eating good with the Ainu, fur debt, getting your punishment beating, the God window, milder wolfsbane, small excrement, throwing yourself on a landmine, and a Lord acton reference?! Chibi Chibi and the Star Serious Lasers! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription this holiday season! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Time is running out this week as Sailor Moon must face the reality that the Outer Senshi have betrayed her! Can she convince her former allies to spare her life or will Galaxia see her dream of conquest realized? In this episode, we discuss the legend of the 47 Ronin, as well as the history of bushido and the samurai in Japanese history. We also talk about whether Superman wears clothes, doing the show in crayon, puddle people and crystals, a big cousin check to cash, calling 119, the Dummy society, not beating about the end of the world, Minako Solo, farmers with sticks, knock-off samurai, going from obi to ascot, Grand Theft Palanquin, galaxy brain bushido, The 47 Pillars, Galaxia's neighbors, the "Thanos pose", a Doomsday situation, and Galaxia is the Utlimate Warrior! Sweet dreams, David Lynch. Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription this holiday season!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! A stunning betrayal ROCKS the Sailor Senshi this week as Galaxia's power grows. Can Sailor Moon and the Sailor Starlights rally themselves to face the threat or will Galaxia hold illimitable dominion over all? In this episode, we discuss the February 28th coup attempt of 1936. We also talk about Space Walmart, Neighborhoodia, a time and a place, Jacob wins, keeping your face, sapphic banter, flirting in the space room, Baby's first murder, the Awakener-in-law, Majin Uranus, a teenage girl Sengoku, Sailor Copper Skunk, the "Showa restoration", killing your principal, getting a good bro-in-law, trivia, and wife ratings! I DECIDE ON HOW THINGS ARE TO BE TREATED Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription this holiday season! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The end of everything begins here as Galaxia casts her evil shadow across the Earth! Can the Sailor Senshi and the Sailor Starlights overcome their differences and face their foe or will darkness claim the galaxy? In this episode, we discuss '"johatsu" or disappearances, the cities of San'ya and Kamagasaki, and kamikakushi or "spirited away". We also talk about high steaks, DBZ as The Simpsons of anime, powerful ball magic, hopeless circus drunks, spontaneous harvesting, our first confirmed animal death, "dipping your Toei in", missing the meta, Scrappying it up, Ice cream flashbacks, Super Saiyan Galaxia, Macguffin hunts, Earth-chan, two-and-a-half feet of contrivance, Japan's Most Wanted, "night movers", Starboobs, trivia, Super Sailor Saturn, and longer ribbons! And we laughed and wept and so on. Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription this holiday season!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Three Lights are taking a bow this week when they decide to play their last show! Will they find the Light of Hope and restore their Princess, or will Galaxia bring down the final curtain? In this episode, we discuss the work culture of Japan and freeters, hikikomori, and karoshi or "work death". We also talk about Sailor Moon polycules, disbanding the band, fish-out-of-water stuff, horned-up lust beasts, having male friends, "wooing" everything, tooching that boot, no-selling a finisher, trying to "Dragon Ball" it, sandbagging, arbeito, freeterhood, overlapping climaxes, Moratorium Guy, and being new to capitalism! If your mind is clouded, everyone will be puzzled! Give the gift of a Sailor Noob Patreon subscription this holiday season! https://www.patreon.com/sailornoob/gift We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Princess Kakyu has arrived and so has a new chapter in Sailor Moon Stars! The Sailor Senshi have discovered a potential new ally, but can they mobilize themselves before Usagi falls prey to Sailor Tin Nyanko? In this episode, we discuss the modern Japanese sports, specifically sumo, karate, and kendo. We also talk about crusades vs. holy wars, sexy angry carrots, The One True Ship, diaper pants, the invention of panties, a triple entender, explaining phones to zoomers, canonical women, shooting a winger, Kryptn, robot geniuses, Sailor Fuku Nyanko, the stair house thing, roulette theories, the evil star god, Sailor Galactus, power water, shikiri rishiki, Tang hand, double crying, and studying for a kendo exam! Good bye ding dong, hello Queen Kong! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! This week, the conflict against the Animamates reaches a new level as Sailor Lead Crow succeeds in capturing the True Star Seed! Can the Sailor Senshi and the Sailor Starlights defeat their enemy or will the galaxy belong to Galaxia? In this episode, we discuss the history of geisha, jokyu or cafe girls, and maid cafes in Japan. We also talk about calligraphic co-dependency, Rule 34 Patterns, Bee Family, singing drummers, Moby Dicking, pink balls, segregating girls and kids, colon hats, eating okra, being very serious, Scott Stapping, Little Rorschach, Sailor Lead Spaghetti, geisha podcasts, courtesan Vaudeville, Tokyo Vice Cops, hero juice, and we're sorry, Women! In Soviet Russia, rod swallow you! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Minako is on the route to stardom this week as she becomes a finalist in an idol competition! Can she win the judges over with her skill and charm or will Sailor Tin Nyanko turn her dream into a nightmare? In this episode, we discuss virtual idols and vtubers in Japan. We also talk about cyberpunk furries, Grand Theft Pacman, unlimited fish eggs, the bit that never comes, caring for the villains, A Starseed is Born, momcore, spider-packages, dating cats, KISSer Price, ending up like Du Jour, Ghost Beats, pizza salad, being uncanny valley-ey, "Weebmalion", the KK Slider/Gorillaz collab, trivia, and an email from the times! Get in the swimsuit, Minako! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! A new challenger appears this week as the girls attend a video game competition! Will Ami rise to victory and confront Taiki or will Sailor Gamer-chan eat up all her continues? In this episode, we discuss the history of Nintendo and its most famous properties. We also talk about FX's Shogun of Harlem, Breaking Bento, pretending to like Star Wars, Sour Cream Lunch, Ami-ga 4000, HMLT, grid girls, 2 out of 10, Rain Manning it, "the Wineglass", garbage characters, Jon Mulaney jokes, the "NO" strategy, Giant Tetris, being willing to work with criminals, Sheriff vs. Bandido, the POW deficit, Kid Icara, and subconscious Twilight! It'sa me! Video! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our new…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The wheel keeps turning this week as the Starlights' past is revealed! Can Seiya make Usagi understand his mission or will his day at the park turn into a night of violence? In this episode, we discuss the Japanese theme parks Hanayashiki, Sanrio Puroland, and Tokyo Disneyland. We also talk about conehead vibes, power swag, Miss Minutes slash fic, double j'ing, two out of three pants, Civil Soldier War, tough bits to commit to, kittymom face, Blonde Waldo, being hot and lonely, Sailor Yogurt, musical telepathy powers, coming around on Seiusa, "adult" vs. "womanly", being mauled by a sex bear, Tokyoites, zoo memorials, Sanrio Fool Land, clown outies, stickers, and doing an "Earth Girls Are Easy"! MEGALOPOLIS We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! This one goes out to all the lovers as Three Lights go on a request and dedication show! Usagi and Seiya are still reeling from last week’s revelations, but can Seiya heal their relationship before the Animamates tear them apart? In this episode, we discuss radio stations and public radio in Japan. We also talk about starseeds, Shogun syndrome, magical queer best friends, defacto cat parents, space drag heroes, Sailor Disco Death Cat, Rule 63 Lou Bega, canine shibari, ro-cat launchers, Holland's juciy boot, musical telepathy, sailor friendzone, the concept of a siren, audio calisthenics, the magic of just sharing things, wanting natto, double black hair, CyberGreek, and autograph boards! It's the '90s! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Things take off this week as Usagi and the girls go on a moonlight flight with Three Lights! But when Sailor Aluminum Siren shows up to crash the party, everyone's deepest secrets will be revealed! In this episode, we discuss the history of aviation in Japan. We also talk about smelling secrets, zoo libraries, my own private Oahu, Viz cope, the Kilometer High Club, lust strength, mes yeux, Fetish Night at the Space Disco, Food Unicorn, Chekov's Plane, Good Morning Manchuko, mokusei, Name that Plane, triparite monsters, and finally AmiMako? Become a permanent thief at the storehouse! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa Overpod!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The squad gets taken out to the ballgame this week as a rival student challenges Usagi and Seiya to softball! Can they find victory on the diamond before the Animamates bring their season to an end? In this episode, we discuss softball in Japan. We also talk about "calques", the old college try, playing with the boys, the Big Book of Hairdos, Lady Fartbutt, mostly guileless, Sailor Scrappiness, a Bad News Bears bet, "everyone", overneath, "new power, gentle wave", kittenball, peer pressuring yourself, softbras, and sailor silhouettes! RIP CPK! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa Overpod! https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/mona-lisa-overpod--6195851 Become a…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Things get noisy AND nosey this week as Usagi and the squad try to track down Chibi Chibi! Which is more mysterious: the existence of Usagi's second(?) daughter or the secret of the land of sweets she disappears to? In this episode, we discuss zaibatsus in Japan and the League of Blood incident. We also talk being a spoiler bloodhound, Pizza Festival, uvula wipes, Japan Girl Dolls, Witchfinder Barbie, saying zarei to seiza, living with Diddy, the corn snack field, press X to Chibi Chibi, robbing the Lost and Found, solid tears, Chuck Jones rules, the "loonification field", the Wilhelm Vase, Money Clique, trivia, and Stilt-Man! ...rolling... We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our new…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Taiki discovers this week what it’s like to have an innocent girl’s heart in his hands…literally! Can he find the strength to give her hope or will the Animamates claim another victim? In this episode, we discuss charity and charitable giving in Japan. We also talk about expensive fruit salad, sex danger, Hospital High School, Somy TV, putting octopus weiners in your mouth, confirming contemporaneity, sipping indolently, Arthur fist, sad giants, being "Crystal long", cartoon foreigners, the scent of liberal democracy, Eric Idle's bloody arm, Kansai dogs, trivia, and the blast and the bubble! RIP James, John, and Emi! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Monsters are dangerous but they've got nothing on teenage boys! When Usagi hosts an impromptu house party (and reality show episode), the Animamates arrive as deadly gatecrashers! In this episode, we discuss Japanese reality shows like Susunu, Denpa Shonen!, Terrace House, and The Boyfriend. We also talk about Jean-Claude Man Dame, wolf cops, Luna's Mom voice, "That's our Rei!", erotic baths, passionate cards, Emilypostichore, nuki ni kuji, the eggplant game, food-throwing age, Michael Keaton recipies, trivia, and building a beautiful bookcase! The eggplant is self-evident! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa Overpod!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! This week, Usagi and friends head to the mountains for a little R&R, but there's someone or something terrorizing campers! Can they solve the mystery of the Camp Ravager before their weekend is cut to ribbons? In this episode, we discuss the Japanese film industry. We also talk about being too hot to act, being an "ichi cousin, san removed", Dewey Cox's sinks, 2 Fast 2 Chibi, bawitdabyebye, having Jason problems, Primary Commanders, Super Nice!, abortive beach episodes, Hibagon, heels in the forest, the Zazie Beats of Japan, what Kal thinks the series end will be, Sunshine Samurai, movie B-sides, and Sailor Potter! RIP Gena, Alain, and Atsuko! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Things feel familiar this week as a tiny bundle of dangoed joy appears from somewhere(?) to meet the Sailor Senshi! Will Usagi solve the mystery of Chibi Chibi before Sailor Cop and the Animamates put her in the cooler? In this episode, we discuss police in Japan. We also talk about having it good in the 90s, Queeging, rookie galaxy numbers, Japan's love for the X-Files, a tan stacked greenhead, retired Artemis, "doing Faith again", Scrap Re-do!, crystal tubes, Ami is the Fred, sentai RoboCop, Cable and Phoenix, going back to the well, more Twilight talk, dancing cops, the art of arrest, trivia, and bicycle stop-and-frisk! I WANT MY BABY BABY LOVE BACK! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Leave us a comment on Spotify!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! CW: violence, sexual assault Things get complex this week as Usagi ends up on a date with Seiya! Is this the start of something special or will Sailor Iron Mouse end them both? In this episode, we discuss host and hostess clubs in Japan. We also talk about downslope speed, sad MakoMina shippers, adult moods, blowing the whistle on Seiya, "makeout territory", Bar Space Edge, Neo Bob Floy's, Eternity for Men or Women, firing the machine back up, the Sex Farce taketh away, unfun squicky vibes, huge Charlie Brown mouths, being the "Goofallant", cartoon drinks, let go and let Kami, and Horse wins! Would you choose Seiya or the bear? We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 LEave us a comment on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Things get cultured this week as Michiru and Three Lights are headlining an international concert! Will they upstage the evil stalking them before they're conducted to an early grave? In this episode, we discuss the Nippon Budokan the famous acts that have played there. We also talk about chicken braking, invalidating zoomers, tube top diplomacy, Minakopropisms, Macaroni and Coco Mishell, joint concerts, the Seihive, Devil Went Down to Juban, Seichiru, sapphic tension blindness, shaky bread, scrimmage handshakes, ruining the karate vibes, beating the Beatles, BNL on indica, and adult sexuality! "I Love 'I Love the '90s'"! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Listen to our new…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! This week, trouble is a-bakin' as the Sailor Senshi face a delicious and deadly foe! Makoto and Usagi are invited on a cooking show, but can they convince Taiki to help them before Shadow Galactica cooks their goose? In this episode, we discuss the history of Iron Chef. We also talk about weird chips, coffee Blake, Tetsuro and Canada, eating brown goo, Sailor WikiFeet, surf terms, sparkly star destroyers, keeping Edward and Bella apart, swallow snot, gaming the Iron Chef, evil cake, Sick rose!, Sailor Trash, and our first Jim Jarmusch reference! Hello, I'm Shelley Duvall! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa Overpod!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Luna is in trouble this week when she falls for the enigmatic Yaten! But can she pull her head out of the clouds in time to save herself and her Byronic boyfriend from Sailor Mademoiselle? In this episode, we discuss the history of cosmetics in Japan. We also talk about having an open face, Eclair de Luna, Shakespeare Moon, Old School Sailor V, shojo nosebleeds, sex farce stuff, Hangin' with Mr. Higashi, going seinen, "almost like girlfriend", #freeJuliana, sorry ladies, Sailor Fredericks of Hollywood, and a moaning after! #RIP Donald Sutherland We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa Overpod!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Taiki is a man who believes in science and not sentiment. But when Ami's favorite teacher becomes the target of Sailor Iron Mouse, their lives will be in Sailor Star Maker's hands! In this episode, we discuss Japanese astronomy. We also talk about anime scientists, Francois Hardy, howling like a dog, being ruined by SuperS, bored Rei, CCR couplets, edible lab coats, Sailor Moon: No Stars, lying with your Tindr pic, poker coffee cups, Kingshippers, The Diggin' Stars, Contacto, planet sonograms, and comets don't care about your feelings! Don't put it up in the air! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa Overpod!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! This week, Seiya finds himself at odds with the director of his new musical. But when Sailor Iron Mouse targets her for seed extraction, Seiya will have to choose between his passion and his mission! In this episode, we discuss Saint Francis Xavier. We also talk about the chef's kiss emoji, 1, 2, 3, 4 vs. 5, 6, 7, 8, PaRappa nightmares, Satan's Army, Jesus Christ Superstar's brother, A&W culture, Musical Neck War, a reverse Thorn Birds, Beans Believing?, shojosing, serviceable dysfunction, No Sex-Men, kami logic, nuclear irony, and the Nezu Code! It's all for the theater kids! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Listen to our new podcast, Mona Lisa Overpod!…

Sometimes we need a break from the day-to-day, and that's when we go on Shore Leave! Shore Leave is our monthly series where we kick back and talk about some of the Sailor Moon and anime-adjacent topics that are on our minds. A real chill-out zone where ideas can hang out and do whatever. And now we're live every Wednesday night at 7pm central on Twitch! This week, we're talking about over-tourism in Japan and Yasuke, the black samurai! Adzuki beans!!! Join Kaliban on Twitch weekdays at 12pm for the Laser Lunch Hour! http://twitch.tv/justenoughtrope Become a patron of the show and get access to our live-action PGSM, Animedification, Utena, and Evangelion podcasts! http://www.patreon.com/sailornoob Put Sailor Noob merch on your body! http://justenoughtrope.threadless.com Sailor Noob is a part of the Just Enough Trope podcast network. Check out our other shows about your favorite pop culture topics and join our Discord! http://www.twitter.com/noob_sailor http://www.justenoughtrope.com…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Minako wants to be a successful idol and getting closer to the boys in Three Lights doesn't sound bad, either. But when she starts working for the band, she'll find out that stardom can come with a deadly cost! In this episode, we discuss sarcasm and its use in Japan. We also talk about future yabbo, hostile wombs, rubbin' rhubarbs, violent bits, Fat Corinthian, Lady Anya Taylor-Joy, vowel cleaning, Faye Dunaway, the concept of "The", the biz of business, cleavage seeds, extra uterus, being an entertainment professional, polite rudeness, soup drink, turtality, and Clinique Refried Beans! GREAT SHOW, SIR! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Become a patron of the show and get…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Important things are afoot this week as Juban High is visited by Three Lights! With their teen idols attending classes with them, will the Senshi be able to keep it together long to defeat a sporty menace? In this episode, we discuss American football in Japan and Kinnikuman. We also talk about Mamousa vs. Seiousa, Edward with a rat tail, Van Pegasus, "Mina Talk Pretty One Day", Kenny Log-ins, Senshi flourishing, shades of Mimette, pizza rats, Mr. Haruna, hot intramural practice, Anger Management Club, Butt Wild Wings, ungentle uteruses, Japanese Adonis, Shogun formation, Samgee Grant, and a whole lot of talk about men's mental health! DANGER ZONE! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The show must go on this week as we say goodbye to old friends and hello to new enemies! With Mamoru and Chibiusa gone, Usagi is doing her best to stay strong, but the appearance of new Sailors will have her asking: what is going on? In this episode, we discuss engagement and arranged marriage in Japan. We also talk about being more "mature", neo vs. post, pteruges, Something Hall, Expo Mako, a Chibi-less world, feline parenting, good screaming, birthday star deeds, sexist girls, budging skills, Rocky Rococo, malice blindness, fish bras, lying in the same grave, drier clams, accent assumptions, Hitch Inc., pulling a Roddenberry, pre-onsen, 747 hell, trivia, and getting a YOU going! What is THAT? We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu!…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The end is finally here this week as the Sailor Senshi confront Nehellenia in her evil lair! Can Usagi find a way to end the cycle of hate or will she lose Mamoru and Chibiusa forever? In this episode, we discuss Tsukuyomi the moon god and his appearance in the Nihon Shoki, "moon reading", Ukemochi, and Amatsu-Mikaboshi. We also talk about training montages, victory mode, animator intervention, "Swifting", Chibi Nehellenia, beating with love, embracing dystopia, "Do we need a Saturn?", Boo Boo tales, male moon deity support groups, ass carrots, trivia, and Satan Moon! The "Eternal Article"?! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Become a patron of the show and get access to our…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The Sailor Senshi are trapped in Nehellenia's realm this week as Usagi falls under a mysterious and forgetful curse. Can her friends save her in time to rescue Mamoru from eternal servitude to the Dark Queen? In this episode, we discuss kitsune yokai, foxfire, Inari, kitsune nybob or "fox wife", kitsune gao or "fox face", kitsune possession, hoshi no tama or "star balls", and kitsune weddings. We also talk about yuriing on your own time, liking WILLOW, the shojo equivalent of shooting someone in the face, class action suits, DaiCon shenanigans, "Can Minako talk?", stoner torments, ESP DSL esq., letting your dangos down, sailor slacks, getting rid of "to be", reverse furries, magical boy creatures, and PG-13 foxes! Even naughty foxes can achieve enlightenment We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! Sailor Moon takes the fight to Nehellenia this week as the curse looms over Mamoru. But when the Sailor Senshi are scattered across multiple worlds, they'll find themselves at the mercy of the Queen of the Dead Moon! In this episode, we discuss the history of basketball in Japan. We also talk about German titles, astrology-based superpowers, BTTF rules, 2000's Sailor Moon, bringing the villain on board, Crystal Nagoya, Azubu-Juban Park, determinedly, the three woman weave, tappa tappa tappa, Mjolnir omlettes, evil wine, and a well-deserved sticker! Every week a new movie! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Become a patron of the show and get access to our live-action PGSM,…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The tension persists this week as the Sailor Senshi ponder the strange events in Tokyo! Can they solve their dilemma before Mamoru is lost to evil? In this episode, we discuss Einstein's travels in Japan. We also talk about weird advent calendars, diagnosing teenagerism, Tyhpoid Usagi, Naru/Umino paint, a rash of lazenings, golden eye-based infidelity, bad luck force multipliers, leftover diapers, retroactive exposition, Moon Hypocrisy Action, evil home renovation, being the Jolene, "they dumb?", and running out of culture! YOU GUYS LIED TO ME! We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Become a patron of the show and get access to our live-action PGSM, Animedification, Utena, and…

Sailor Noob is the podcast where a Sailor Moon superfan and a total noob go episode by episode through the original Sailor Moon series! The treachery continues this week as Nehellenia expands her dark power through the reflections of Tokyo! Can the Sailor Senshi find a way to meet this overwhelming new challenge or is the world in for a new dark age? In this episode, we discuss the learning English in Japan. We also talk about junior boomers, Myler: The Real Enemy, bootleg "Just Shoot Me", domesticating the Outers, Charlie Chaplin suits, 3 Women and a Former Baby, Phantom 90, BASICheads, Lynchian vibes, being "filler-proof", World History movies, frenetic obstacles, le weed, Sailor Moon: Civil War, and being treated like a potato! Are you there, Takeuchi? It's me, Haruka. We're on iTunes and your listening platform of choice! Please subscribe and give us a rating and a review! Arigato gozaimasu! https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sailor-noob/id1486204787 Answer this week's show question on Spotify! Become…